Who's the Boss?

Our house in Redlands was sold.

Josh had left the day before with both cars, the dogs, my brother and his friend, and my dad. Our television was carefully packed in the trunk, leaving my mom and I very bored as we waited for our flight the next day.

We locked up the house one last time and waited for our ride.

Chatting easily the 20 minutes to the airport, my nerves were holding out, all things considered. Kayden was always an easy traveler; with my mom as my companion, I knew it would be even smoother. Getting strollers and carry-ons through the security checkpoint is so much quicker with two sets of adult hands.

As we approached the ticketing counter, I noticed our flight was delayed.

Like...15 hours delayed.

They offered to shuttle us to Orange County airport for a flight leaving in four hours, but it was possible to get all the way there and miss that flight as well. You can never tell with Los Angeles traffic just how long it will actually take. Being that Kayden was only 9 months old, we opted to wait.

No home to return to, we asked if we could check in our luggage and take a taxi to the mall, about 15 minutes away.

Sure, they said. Our luggage could be checked 12 hours before the flight. If we wouldn't mind waiting, they would be happy to hold it after that.

We spread out a sheet (thank goodness we had it from the night before), and settled in next to a slew of army soldiers. Watching their tearful goodbyes and easy camaraderie, three hours went by quicker than expected.

Bags checked at exactly t minus 12 hours, we called a taxi to take us to the mall. Explaining our situation, and therefore lack of car seat, they dispatched a cab with built in car seat.

We had a wonderful time at the mall. Kayden remained in good spirits, and I was thrilled to tire him out a bit before the flight.

Dialing back the taxi company, they informed us that we needed our own car seat in order for them to dispatch a driver.

After arguing with that operator, and her boss, and then trying back three more times to find someone that could find the cab we took... we were getting no closer to the airport and closer to our flight leaving without us.

Racking our brains, we called other cab companies, friends that might be able to come transport us. Something, anything, to get us there.

Dead end on all fronts.

There was a kids section in the JC Penny, so the final and only solution as we saw it was to purchase a $90 car seat for the 15 minute ride. Kayden did not fit in it correctly, it wasn't even strapped in, but the cab driver was clueless.

At the curb, we checked the new car seat in box and headed off for our flight.

Which was now delayed yet again.

The ticketing agent offered to re-route us, but it would take another two hours in the air.
My mom and I both agreed that it was the best option.

As we took out our tickets to board the airplane, I noticed I was sitting in 3B and my mom was in 16D.

I have never felt so weary. The events of the week- packing up our house, getting everything cleaned for the new owners, saying goodbyes- combined with the never ending day of trying to catch a flight made me a crumpled mess.

I went into the ugly cry.

You know the one. There is no hiding the ugly cry, and any soul around knows you are bawling. Mouth gaping, tears pouring.

An angel passenger offered to help rearrange seating for us. Her husband and her did not care if they split up, so she offered to trade.

As my mom and I fell into our seats, I have never in my life felt more relief.

Finally safe and on our way home.

I think that is how I am going to feel at the end of this.

Relief.

This week has been a whirlwind of late nights, long days, shuffling of kids...and I feel weary. The lack of sleep definitely has something to do with it, but the larger picture of the unknown forces me to live each day not knowing if today is the day we find out whether we get to keep her.

Days like today, with such little sleep from last night, the ugly cry comes out often.

We again found our way to labor and delivery after bleeding from 9:30 last night to around 6am this morning. Josh had been at home with the boys, and woke them up at 5am to drop them off at my brother's.

She is already showing all of us who the boss is, huh?

To my mom's credit, my boys are adjusting very well and I am beginning to wonder if they will ever want to come home. They LOVE Grandma's house.

Please pray for the never ending shuffle going on over here. Either my mom or Josh are here with me every night, and I can tell this whole thing is starting to get old with everyone. Mostly me. I long for a good night's sleep. The world feels balanced when I am able to get a decent night's worth.

The ugly cry comes out far less often.

I turn 25 weeks plus 3 days tonight at midnight.

Ever inching onward.