How we met

I was working at Rogers Department Store during Christmas of 1997 when I first met Josh.

My co-worker, Amy, helped him pick out a pair of pants. As his parents were browsing through the other racks near the entrance, Amy approached the check out counter where I was folding t-shirts.

"He would be such a good catch," she sighed, looking longingly at Josh. "A Christian teacher, living in California. Talk about perfect."

Amy got busy helping another customer, so I got to meet her 'great catch' as I wrung up the pants he was purchasing. All of the dress slacks came un-hemmed, so we chatted easily as we waited on alterations to measure him.

Soon enough, the pants were marked for sewing, and the Bird family was on their way out of the Young Men's Department.

Christmas came and went, with my departure from customer sales immediately after. I did not want to deal with exchanges and returns. My final day was December 26.

January 2nd, a letter was dropped off (by Josh's dad) to the store.

A while later, I went back to pick up an old paycheck for $1.34 and chat with friends still in the department. As I was leaving, my old boss drew my attention to the letter from Josh pinned to the bulletin board.

Inside, it read that he enjoyed our short chat, and if I ever got bored with the clouds of Michigan to give him a call.

Arriving home from a week long Newport Beach vacation, my return letter was in his stack of mail six months later.

Who is from Jenison, Michigan? Josh wondered as he opened the thank you card.

Thus began our snail mail courtship.

The letters got longer and more elaborate as each one arrived. In his scrawling penmanship, Josh detailed his life and interests. Slowly, feelings started creeping in and small gifts arrived with each package. Pictures exchanged back and forth, usually with Josh 100 feet from the camera. I would squint to get an idea of what he looked like.

All I remembered was that he was tall.

Summer flew by as we upgraded to e-mail. Rushing to the computer each time I arrived home, I anxiously awaited each message and spent hours typing replies.

Late one evening, I got the nerve to give him a call.

And thus began hours and hours of late night chats. With the 3 hour time difference, we often spoke in hushed voices early into the morning.

Summer turned into fall, and my 20th birthday was fast approaching. My birthday gift? Josh purchased a ticket for me to fly out and meet face to face.

My mother was so mad (rightfully so), she did not speak to me for three days.

I headed off to the airport in a torrential rain storm. As my umbrella turned inside out, my stomach felt uneasy. This was the first time I was traveling anywhere alone. Flying 3000 miles to meet a complete stranger, I wasn't 100% if I remembered what he looked like.

Back in the day, flights flew empty. I had a lot of time to think about what I was doing. Stopping halfway down the jet bridge upon landing, I wondered if it was too late to turn back.

I inched forward with my stomach in knots. Standing at the end, I saw Josh holding a dozen red roses with a huge grin on his face.

He was the most handsome man I had ever seen.

We went back to the house I was staying at (one of his student's families), to another dozen roses and a journal to keep track of my thoughts for the week.

Whirlwind. That is how I would describe it. We went everywhere- Palm Springs, Santa Monica, Venice Beach, Hollywood.

I knew it that week.

I was madly in love.

I cried the whole way home.

Christmas found us back together again. We even got bonus time when he got snowed in an extra day.

I flew out in February and March. He came home in April for our engagement.

Each and every time we had to say goodbye was harder than the last. I was sure my heart would rip out as the airplane wheels lifted off.

We got engaged in the Spring, and set the date for Christmas.

Some tough things happened that year, and all I wanted was someone to hug me and tell me everything was going to be okay. Living so many miles apart, those seven months dragged as we waited to become one.

Yesterday, a good friend said to me "I know it seems like a long time, but you will look back on this hospital stay and it won't seem like forever."

As I look back, twelve years later, our engagement apart felt like a blink.

Distance has a way of doing that, huh?

About once a week, I have a mental break down when I feel like I cannot do this one more day. Ready to throw in the towel and go home to MY bed and normal nights where I can cuddle my boys in bed and watch cartoons and tickle them. Sit outside by the fire and roast marshmallows, or watch the boys ride bikes to the park.

This morning I hit the wall.

I am sure a year from now, this time spent on bed rest will feel like a short blip in time.

Probably even shorter for my kids.

Yesterday marked two weeks since we arrived, ten weeks since diagnosis.

Please pray that the time would pass quickly as we wait on an answer. It feels like an eternity currently.