Thursday, August 4, 2011

Ramblings

I started MiniMe BabyGear when Kayden was a few months old, with the intention of sewing everything myself.

That worked really well until the Wet Happened? wet bag took off.

I remember sitting downstairs at my mom's house, printing off my largest order yet. Ten bags! I couldn't believe it. I had not received ten orders for the entire month, and then to have them all in one day....my mom babysat Kayden overnight for me to work. Back then the bag was so handmade, it was actually hand sewn.

Summer of 2004 came, and a large blog featured the bags. 124 orders came in before noon. I worked 70 hours a week that summer sewing wet bags. Josh would be outside swimming, I would be in the basement with my winter boots on (our basement is freezing!) assembling bags.

Target came knocking next, with an initial order of 6,000 bags.

I controlled it all. The fabric choices, the packaging, the website, the marketing.

There was something that felt really good about that; watching my business grow. I take no credit for the success, mind you. I always say it was a lot of God, and a little bit of good timing.

Anyway, I was working all the time. From 3-5 pm and then again from 8pm to 3am, I would try to accomplish what I could. I never caught up, and was stressed and sick constantly.

About two years ago, I partnered with Itzy Ritzy, who took over the manufacturing and distribution. They have done a great job and I know the Wet Happened? wet bag is in very capable hands.

Thing is, it was really hard to let go.

That business was my baby.

When you have poured your blood, sweat, and tears into something, it becomes such a huge part of you. I struggled to step back and let someone else take over.

It's a million times harder with Tessa.

I have a baby, but she's not here at home with me.

Strangers care for her.

I have to trust that they are giving her the correct milk.

That they don't mess up the dose.

That they are washing their hands before they care for her.

They will hear her when she cries and comfort her.

They will know if she is too hot or cold.


It has led to what I like to call "NICU Neurosis". The total lack of control can make one crazy.


I do pretty well during the day, but night time is terrible. The only time I actually relax is when one of my favorite nurses is on duty (we love you, Rachael:-)

I realize this is all part of the stress of having a baby in the hospital, but any prayers you would offer up on my behalf would be appreciated.

As always, please pray for Tessa to remain free from any infections. My little porker is up to 3 lbs, 3 ounces, and I would like her to keep growing and gaining!

Thank you for your faithful prayers.

4 comments:

sally said...

I really felt that way after I got the picture (referral) for Tyler and Macy and was waiting for them to fly from Korea. That's a tough feeling. Many prayers going up for your entire family. You are so loved by so many.

grammyjan(mom) said...

I am praying for you! My granddaughter Maya weighed that much when she was born. Now, I can picture the size little Tessa is! Maya is now a healthy 6 year old, by the way! She's a beautiful and precious little girl! Tessa is growing so well! Just keep telling yourself that, and let that be your reassurance that she is being well cared for even though you can't be there with her! And, OF COURSE, she is in GODS hands ALWAYS!

I'm Angie. said...

i know how crazy we get with our products and can feel your pain with your most precious handmade product - miss tessa. hang in there...she's well taken care of and feels your constant love and touch. 3,3 = amazing!!! what a chunker!

sue said...

I know the feeling well...trusting someone else to care for your baby is a tough thing. I try to remember God loves them even more than I do! Hang in there, she is beautiful:)