Today's Appt

I have to be honest- I am not even sure what to pray for.

I took a nap this morning. When I woke up, I was sure this was just a bad dream.

Every kick I feel reminds me that I am slowly suffocating this baby.

We went to my doctor this morning, who led us through the process of what will happen. The hard part is that no one really knows.

One thing is certain- the baby will not live. I asked him if he has ever seen a case where the outcome turned out well, and he said no.

More bad new-it is possible that I will carry this baby full term. I am praying with everything I have that doesn't happen. I have had horrible labor and deliveries with the boys and I really do not want to go through all of that for a baby that has no chance of surviving.

The next step is to go to a maternal-fetal specialist and get a full ultrasound to try and figure out what is causing all of this. Regardless, with such little amniotic fluid this early, my hope is slowly leaving.

On top of all that, both Josh and my mom have the flu.

Thanks for all the messages, prayers, and love- we have felt it and it has helped tremendously.